Sunday, December 4, 2011

Frustration Abounds

To be honest, I've been more than a little frustrated lately.

Ever since I started my new job, my life has been a ball of stress and paranoia where my mind has been preoccupied almost totally by my job situation and the possibility of losing it over flimsy bullshit.  I've also been frustrated by my own "new guy" screw-ups, especially on Friday.  On top of all that, my financial situation hasn't really improved.  I've still been broke most of the time, mostly because it's been rent time.  I really hope I can get things to turn around soon.

"What magical things have you been doing to improve the situation", I hear some of you asking.  To start with, I've been deploying field magic at my workplace by deploying things like High John oil in my cubicle, and Commanding oil to strategic areas that my coworkers and boss will walk across and touch.  In addition to that, I've resorted to some informational magic by injecting an idea into my boss (That I should keep working there).  So far, my principle focus has been my boss, as my coworkers have been much more forgiving of the foibles of a new person, especially since the place I work at has one of those loose, play-it-partly-by-ear IT departments.

However, there are aspects of my own skillset that I've been intensely dissatisfied with (mostly stuff that got rusty with disuse), and with the recent instability of the department I work in.  So those are what I'm going to focus on further with more temple work and a little bit more field magic.  Financial and economic instability, hindered performance...these are things that are related to the influence of Jupiter and Mercury when they're retrograde, if I'm not mistaken.  And Jupiter and Mercury are currently both retrograde, of course.

Things have been complicated further by a recent bout of aimlessness and complete uninspiration with my practices.  I'm trying to overcome that and get my engines going again.

On a practical note, in the past few days I came across tech that I think would be useful to me over at Magick of Thought, which I found through the blogroll of the awesome Mr. Black over at Beyond Chaos Magick.  Namely, I've been working with the technique of finding and adopting my Mental Posture for working magic.  So far I've only given it a limited test run, but it looks promising.  I'm looking to do some practical work with it soon and see what happens.

5 comments:

  1. Sucks that things are going all shaky for you at the moment. :(

    Going beyond the magical, do you have your mundane plans laid out? Books to study, budgets to make and timelines for goals, etc?

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  2. Thanks for the link, looks interesting.

    Shoot me an email if there's any work you'd like me to do for you; I'd be happy to help.

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  3. The field magic sounds good, but maybe taking the domineering approach isn't the best course of action. Instead of trying to use domination- and controlling-type magic, why not use something more accepting or flowing? Maybe things are meant to be handled another way than through force; metaphors of water from the Tao Te Ching come to mind, as well as Fr.RO's recent statement "move, or move me".

    Either way, good luck in getting shit done! Things'll pass well one way or another, once you figure out how to get along with them.

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  4. @John: Thanks! :)

    @Unlikely: I do. I've read halfway through a copy of Dave Ramsey's "Total Money Makeover" and am trying to implement several of his ideas. I've been writing up budgets. Timelines? Loosely, yes. I'm also looking at sources of secondary income including a part-time job, making & selling stuff, etc.

    @Pallas: Thanks, man! I really appreciate it. I may very well take you up on that.

    @Polyphanes: You have a good point. Before this week I focused on beefing myself up in a commanding kind of way, but this week I've begun doing work more toward success at the job. One thing I'm working with is "Crown of Success" condition oil and products (incense, powder, etc.). I think I'll also take the oil to work with me and dress things like my mouse, keyboard, etc.

    In general, the good thing about the new job is that it pays substantially more than the job I just left. That's why I've been so stressed about the possibility of losing it. It's one of those cases where you're starting to feel like what you need close to being in your grasp. If I lose this job, it'll be like having that jerked away at the last second, for the umpteenth time in the past couple of years.

    To everyone: Thanks for the well-wishes, I'll keep you all updated.

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