Thursday, January 12, 2012

[New Year, New You] Relax, Don't Do It

This post is part of the New Year, New You experiment in radical magical transformation.  I'm late coming in to this prompt, but its call is simple: Do something nice for yourself.

This prompt has been surprisingly hard to do.  I know what would really be a treat for me right now: spending time by myself, enjoying some of my favorite things, and not thinking about or working on anything that I currently need to.  Unfortunately I haven't been able to do that.

Life's been pretty stressful.  Work has been the major source of high anxiety for me, and my truck has required more repair recently to the tune of a couple hundred dollars.  I really can't put into words how unearthly tired I am of my near future being so uncertain.

On the positive side of things, I am making great progress toward my NYNY goal: Catching my bills up and starting on my emergency fund.

But what to do between working towards my goals and being stressed out?

Lately, I've at least been giving myself one indulgence that is a classic for me: Videogames.  I haven't had much time for them anymore, but in the past, videogames were a source of stress relief and distraction for me.  Immersion in a fictional world can feel good because you don't necessarily have all your cares and woes.  I'm not nearly as much of a gamer as I used to be, but every now and then, it's nice to sit down, let go, and stomp the shit outta some darkspawn or other monsters!

Additionally, I've been keeping my meditation practice on most nights, and will continue to do so.  Part of my problem is that I get bound up inside my own head and can't stop my thoughts from running away with me.  Meditation has provided a way for me to escape that, and to take more control back.  With all the worry I've been experiencing lately, I need meditation now more than ever.

That's about all I have for now.  Tonight finds me physically, mentally, and emotionally exhausted.  I'm gonna go enjoy some sangria and soft music.

1 comment:

  1. I can definitely relate to your struggles, it was a hard prompt for me too. I just keep reminding myself one foot in front of the other.